Windows in My life

Showing posts with label VW. Show all posts
Showing posts with label VW. Show all posts

Monday, March 26, 2012

Green Bear - A Car Story

The year 1962. The place Walnut Creek, California. The time, say mid morning. A newly rolled out VolksWagon in a car dealership sparkling in the sun. Elvis is playing on the AM radio some where. A man in a suit and tie walks towards a couple as they peer into the freshly washed window, of the newest 1963 model, seeing the new leather, room for their growing family and shopping. They buy the car and enjoy it.   Ten years down the road, same family, yet they are a little older, have two daughters who lay on the hood like car models they see in magazines. The family keeps the car very well maintained for an older model VW.
sorry its upside down

Eighteen years later, a family member is in need to take a baby to and from places, the car is given to a new owner with some sadness from the old owner. The memories flood back and as the car drives away, the woman wonders if she will ever see it again.

A little shy of the car's thirtieth year of life, tragedy hits. In the hills of Marin County coming back from a weekend trip to Napa, the original engine dies and the guy driving the car is forced to tow it to a shop to get it replaced. He still needs it to get around and to see the little girl that is growing up. She has named it "Green Bear" as it is green and for no other reason, the man lets her call it that. The car doesn't mind at all. Another tragedy comes when it's broken into several times because it is old and people think it can be just taken on a joy ride. The man tells the little girl that he might have to either sell it or junk it. She cries. He decides to take it off the streets, his sister gives him a new car, her old car, and he takes it to Napa for a few years.

In the mists of these years it sat waiting for the man to bring it back to life, which he did on the weekends when he was in Napa. Then one day, he turns the car towards the freeway and doesn't stop till he's in Oakland, where that once young girl is standing now a teenager, and has a license to drive! She is new to the road. Doesn't take it easy on the now thirty-five, or thirty-six years old car. She wants to explore the world. The man says "Do not take it on the freeway, as it's not safe for you or the car". The girl nods and plots to go to places that are only accessible by the freeway. And she does. The man says "do not drive on too many hills, as it's not safe for you or the car", the girl does anyway.

Being a first time driver she is very rough on the car. She has many accidents with it and for a time it does not run. Yet the car is ingrained in her soul. She has it for a few more months after she graduates from high school and then it's returned to Napa to wait patiently for the return of her. Years are not too good on the car.

On it's fortieth birthday it is in Napa baking in the sun, the rain rusting parts that were so lovely taken care of. The feeling that the scrap heap is its final destination. The man tells the young woman that she's better off with out it. She again cries. She vows not to let it go. He purses his lips, but let's this battle go.

In its late forties, the car has seen better days, it feels like its going to wither in the sun, until the girl comes and says, "I am taking you with me!" and proceeds to hook up the car to a hitch as the car's tires are not yet tested to drive long distances. Again it is sidelined for a newer car, however not in the elements as it once was. A few months later, it is again hitched to a trailer and taken to the streets of a small city, again exposed to the elements. Immobile by the years of neglect. The woman and her husband roll it to one side of the street to the other side every other week. The car gets a few tickets because of forgetfulness on their part. A year goes by and finally it gets taken to a repair shop and it gets a small dose of tender loving care. It perks up and starts to run again. A few weeks later it gets placed in a garage, away from the elements, away from the street weepers. It is now waiting for more tender loving care from the woman.

Now the car is in its fiftieth year. Most cars are gone from that era. It knows that. It is very lucky to be in a garage when most of its counter parts are now buried in rust. The woman has two small girls. It hopes to be running great by the time they are old enough to drive. When it becomes sixty years old.

Thank you for reading. The car has been passed down from my aunt to my dad to me. Some of the facts from the 1960's I am not too sure of, so don't treat them like they are real facts. I only know what people have told me.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Dear sixteen year old self,

Can you believe you are now 32? Have two daughters, a husband, a house, and the VW?
Me at 16 with my friend Winston

I know it seems far fetched because you are in the mist of a melt down. You will get help and medication for what you are finding out from your biological father about a chemical imbalance in your brain called Bi-Polar Mania. The medication will make things better, but our mom will not.

When you are 18, she will call the cops and have them place you under a 5150, though its hard for the doctors to find out what is wrong with you after the first 12 hours of being there. Some of them think our mom should be in here, not you. When you get back to your home, your mother is there with a restraining order not to go near her or your childhood home. All of this at the start of your last year in high school, how rude right?

You do graduate from Skyline High School with top honors. Both the Future Teachers and Preforming Arts magnate completions and honor roll cords. I think we were the first person to do such a thing in the schools history. I doubt that few will remember, but we will!

It took us a few more years to complete college than we had hoped. 1 year in City College and 5 years in San Francisco State University. You met a few friends, laughed and tried so hard to shed the awkwardness about you by reinventing yourself a few times. However it seemed not to work and the self doubt haunts you even to this day. 

You did get a job at the PlayStation Store San Francisco in the Metreon. Yup you get into video games. You actually meet your husband there, however don't know it yet, and meet another guy that will break your heart into a million pieces and runs back to Michigan. So when you see a tall handsome, blond hair, blue eyed guy that is just as shy, RUN AWAY! 

A few years later when you're about to turn 27, our mother dies and you lose your childhood home to fore-closer. You have days from when you find out that she has died to when they take it away, to prioritize the things that you want to take with you and the things you will never see again. And those decisions still haunt you till this day.

A year latter you get married and another year after that your first daughter is born. Bella is a great little girl and brings mountains of joy. So in 2011 you try once again and you have another daughter Grace and you decide to give her our mother's middle name as hers. 

Please do not be scared as this is even over whelming to your 32 year old self. Just know that you do not become what your mother has told you, however the bit about the girls were right. 

You are not crazy, you do become loved by yourself, and you are loved by others.