Windows in My life

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Lost and Found


I think this is fitting, at least for me. It is hard to say I need help or I really need someone to listen to me rather than the one that does all the listening. It is easy for me to shut down and distance myself from the masses to not hurt them or say something really mean to them and I can't take their friendship back. 

I have pulled away from a bunch of social networking sites because the people there weren't listening or if they were keeping silent because they didn't know what to say or do with me. All they had to do was send me a virtual hug or send me a text with "what's going on? are you doing anything? want to talk on the phone?" Or even Skype once and a while.

Baking has helped, being lost in the making of the dough, not thinking of the worries that are outside my class room door. Being in a world that doesn't involve the hub bub of the real world, I can just be me. Everyone sees a different side of me however I can't just "Be me " as a friend put it. I really do try, however like I said in a previous post, people want me to be a certain way and then I have to be that way. When I change to my true self, people get confused and then they are the one's that get another persona so I just bow to their will. What a life?

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